Ricki Lewis, a genetic counselor and biology textbook author, has her own unique take onย the salacious bestselling book and now record-breaking movie.
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Megabestseller โFifty Shades of Greyโ tells the tale of Anastasia Steele, an innocent ensnared within the orbit of the mysterious โdominatorโ Christian Grey. Despite its enshrinement at the top of the Amazon ranks, the book reads as if written by a horny 15-year-old.ย Since I write biology textbooks, I thought it might be fun to recast the dance of the nubile Anastasia and the well-endowed sadist Mr. Grey, using language from the book. [I asked the question:]ย What if “Fifty Shades of Grey” was about — digestion?
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Christian has a surprise for me.ย
Weโd been making love โ oops, thatโs not what heโd call it โ for hours, and Iโm ravenous. Christian normally wouldnโt be caught dead in a kitchen, but he makes me wait in his chamber while he goes to get something special โ a hot dog.
When he comes back in, I stare in astonishment at the glistening wiener, itโs skin crispy from the Foreman grill, my salivary glands answering instantly to the tantalizing aroma. The six-inch-long dog nestles within the creamy white folds of a roll, peeking out from beneath shiny curls of pungent sauerkraut. Despite Christianโs obvious efforts to please me with this suggestive culinary display, I gently extract the dog, wipe away the mustard, and hold it up, admiring its length.
โI wonder if you can guess what Iโd like you to do with that wiener,โ Christian says, huskily, as I feel myself respond, yet again, down there. I blush.
Smiling mischievously, I part my luscious lips and painstakingly push in the hot dog. In and in and in it goes.
โThatโs it baby, take it all, you can do it!โ Christian cheers me on. Heโs often commented on my apparent lack of a gag reflex. I flush crimson.
But I fear the full length dog will lodge itself in my pharynx, so I slowly withdraw it, pausing to bite my lower lip, drawing it away from its supportive frenulum, for I know this drives Christian mad with desire.
I actually am quite hungry. I tilt my head slightly back, my eyes rolling back in anticipation, my mouth slackening as I moan in pleasure and take the tiniest nibble from the dog, slipping the slightly dented end of the fragrant frankfurter between my swollen lips.ย
Christian watches, mesmerized. I then take several tantalizing bites, using my tongue to fashion the macerated pink flesh into a swallowable bolus.ย
Read full, original article: If “Fifty Shades of Grey” Had Been Written by a Biology Textbook Author
